Do you know anyone who is really, actually stupid? Not like "Oh, they did a dumb thing" stupid, but really not smart...to the point where it's REALLY annoying/pathetic/hilarious?

A co-worker of mine is stupid. Literally, fully stupid. I cannot stand her, for MANY MANY MANY reasons. One is that she is just SO damn clueless.

She went to school for her job ("skilled labor" I suppose) and still has NO idea how to do it. She's constantly asking me "how do I do this? How do I do that?" But then has the balls to tell ME how to do MY job (Which she doesn't know how to do or what it actually entails either.)

Has anyone used gold leaf? You know it comes in 2 kinds...a thin layer on paper and one that's more loose and not quite in sheets. Well, she was gold leafing a sign and used the loose stuff because "the other stuff is too hard to peel off the paper." Um...you don't peel it off, you stick it to the sizing and it comes off the paper. The sign looks like SHIT and this is something she "learned" in school.

Her name is Michelle, but goes by something else, and one day she was reading a thing in a magazine that said something about Sarah Michelle Gellar. She reads "Sarah Michael Geller". HELLO! That's YOUR OWN DAMN NAME!

Then there's the "Doo-vet" cover. The time she tried to kill my fish AFTER I told her you can't just add tap water to the bowl. I know there's more, I just can't think of them right now....she's SO dumb.

Anyway, I have a hard time dealing with her. Partly because she's stupid and partly because she's a moody, nosey, gimme gimme bitch.

Tell me your tales of TRUELY stupid people and how you deal with them.

Thanks.

hmm, i've never met someone that's THAT dim, but I have a peeve, the dumb person who lets their dog leave #2 all over the sidewalk/lawn/garden at my complex. There is a teenage boy, maybe about 15 years old, very nice kid, anyway my neighbor told me that he saw the woman with her dog and asked her to clean up after her dog, and she gave him attitude and said no. What kind of person gets caught doing something wrong and then gives attitude to a KID? What a lowlife.

jt

I have a co-worker that does not seem to get it...here is the conversation I overheard this morning.

Co-worker "a": "We might have to pull a bell to bell tomorrow"

Co-Worker "B" "really, what time"

(okay, this may not be dumb to all of you,but at my company a bell to bell is ALWAYS 8 to 8)

Co-Worker "A" "we will be getting an email about it later"

Co-Worker "B" "I haven't received any email"

Now she is complaining to anyone who will listen that she got a really bad raise and she just does not think that is fair, she says she does overtime and everything. The thing is, when she does overtime it is so she can make it to her quota, but we are not supposed to even do overtime unless we have already made our quota! Even though she is told this all the time, it never sinks in!

I have encountered two of the most stupid humans in existance, they both happened to be male.. One was my sisters bf... who popped her waterbed ( yes my sister is all class) and then tried to vacuum up the water. When he set the smoke alarm off when cooking instead of reachingup and turning it off he ripped it out of the wiring and destroyed it.. this happened at least 5 times.
He goes by the name Jr. mainly because he cannot spell his real name John. I could go on for hours on his stupidity...he even would sing along to the "werewolves of london" song but he insisted that it was Serewoods instead of werewolves...he was a foul human being who was so methed up that he attacked a 2 year old ( my niece ) and myself...I have nightmares that my sister divorces her husband and decided to get back together with that moron.... eeesh.

The other bimbo was an aquaintance I felt sorry for because his roomate threw him out. It was a bad decision. This kid was an airhead.. and eventually I was driven to therapy because he made me so angry I had visions of smothering him in his sleep. Ontop of being slightly dim, he was also raised in a very sheltered environment and was highly religious. I have nothing against the religious part..but he was very judgemental of others and showed his ignorance on many occaisions... He was also having a severe sexual identity crisis and was caught using my credit card to pay for male/male porn sites. And made everyone in the house feel creeped out if we even watched sex on tv. He was also extremely lazy as well.. I am not sure how he finally finished school becaus ehe never did an assignment he copied others work and skimmed by. So maybe we were the stupid ones and not he..... We allowed him to be a mooch and get his way.

I thought perhaps he was just dropped as a child. But then I met his sister who is the duplicate of him. Those two should not be allowed around sharp implements...

beano:

your co-worker may have low literacy skills. her reading her own name wrong set off bells in my mind. low-literate people develop amazing coping skills to get through schooling (even high school and college), and it's quite possible she went through her entire training program without being able to read. so she may have missed a lot. this is far more common than you might think!

does she make a good deal of her mistakes on things that would be easy if she read instructions? does she make up excuses for why she hasn't/won't read certain things? (ie does she "forget her glasses" or "not have time" when someone hands her a memo) things to look for..

and she might be moody and grabby simply because she is having a hard time getting through life.

however, you are still entitled to your rant. it IS totally frustrating to work with people who can't or don't do the job right! this is just something to consider.

ag

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Yes, she REALLY is that dumb. She's not a cutesy cutesy play dumb kind of girl. She's actually a really icky butchy girl who has bragged to me on numerous occasions that she's gotten so mad that she punched out a car window. Classy lassy.

She's also pushed one of my other co-workers and threatened her. I honestly don't know why she still works here and I really wish bad upon her.

Anyway, Agnes, she CAN read. She read things, she just can't comprehend things. AT ALL. It's like she never learned what letters sound like and what words mean. Seriously.

And Yes, she screws up on LOTS of things that if she just READ (and understood) she'd get right. Because it's nothing hard. For example, to change a phone # on a sign. I issue a thing saying "123-456-7890" and there's a drawing attached that shows "123-456-7890" on the sign. AND, in the computer file the "123-456-7890" is ALL set and ready for her to make. BUT, somehow she manages to put "345-724-6732" on the sign. It shouldn't be easy to screw that up. I sometimes wonder if she does it on purpose!

If she weren't such a bitch I'd probably have an easier time dealing with it. She thinks she knows everything and actually knows nothing. I did her job for like 5 years and when I make a suggestion on how to do something better or quicker or whatever I get "mind your own fucking business."

Oh, and I forgot that EVERYDAY- no exaggeration- she takes a BIG stinky slimy dump in the bathroom. And then uses lysol cleaner as airfreshener. And yes, I KNOW it's her.
Disgusting.

I once had a coworker who asked me, "How do you spell 'P.O. Box'?"

The people who annoy me most are those who think that if *they* don't personally know a fact, it must be unknowable...

Like the boss who got a brochure from an overseas company advertising *jewellery*. He laughed and laughed about those stupid foreigners and their "misspelling" in this costly advertisement, until I pointed out that that is the correct British spelling of the word. He spent the rest of the day making fun of me for knowing such an impossible thing.

Or the coworker who got all pissy-indignant at me for daring to know the proper definitions of "horizontal" and "vertical" - as if this were some complicated arcana beyond ordinary human understanding. This is the same woman who refused to believe there was a country called "Chad" until we showed it to her on a map - and even then was still skeptical. (She also spent hours each day yelling and swearing over the phone at her teenage children, and then wondered why they kept getting in trouble at school.)

Arrrrghhhh, stupid people.

katrin,
that's so funny! I bet you didn't even bother to state the fact that there is a country called Djibouti! :)

jt

There's this girl in one of my classes who is so silly sometimes I just can't believe it. It's a three hour block class. We have a break about halfway through. She is perpetually making calls on her cellphone IN THE ROOM, and most of the time they are to one of her parents to ask how her dog is doing. She also won't shut up about this dog. And she asks dumb questions all the time.

But, this week's dumb question took the cake. We have to read two articles every week and then discuss them in class. Last week we read an article by a guy who was also our prof's dissertation advisor. And if you had been paying ANY attention to the articles up to now or listening to anything our prof told us in class you would have been able to surmise this (or at least figure out that they knew each other). We've had to read at least two articles that they've coauthored and this guy is with the same university that our prof got his doctorate at. Anyway, after we discuss this article, the girl asks the prof "so do you know this guy XY?" The prof is sort of confused (english is also not his first language, which heightened the confusion). After several minutes of this back and forth, during which the guy next to me and I are trying not to collapse totally with laughter, the prof goes "Oh! Yes! He is my advisor for my doctorate." And the girl was totally not fazed by this.

I'm sure I'll think of some more stupid people later. This thread is evil but it's too fun.

I have two.

First, I was working in the health food shop. Customer walks in, asks about certain supplement and I say sorry, but we're out; it has been ordered, whereupon she becomes FURIOUS and practically yells at me "WELL, then I want to be reimbursed for my drive here! It took me 45 MINUTES to get here!" I say sorry, we can't do that. The best thing is to call ahead and ask if we have supplement X since you have to drive so far... blah blah. She refuses to listen and keeps demanding money or a discount on the smaller size of supplement X. Finally my boss steps in and says go ahead, give her 10% off the smaller size.

Second, a relative's wife is VERY sweet, kind and generous but not very smart. During conversation with my mother, she: "...and I got the... the... what do you call the thing you use to wash clothes with?" my mom: "washing powder" she: "Yes! Washing powder!" She wasn't going to say "detergent" because we don't have another term in Swedish.

There is a girl who used to go to my school, until she got pregnant. She named her daughter Serenity Rain. I heard her tell someone once that girls go to college to find a husband, and she honestly had no idea why they would want to go for any other reason. She talks in a little baby blinky smiley voice, so all of the dumb things she says sound even dumber. She works in a resteraunt and her manager had to make her a list of things she wasn't supposed to do at the hostess stand, like to not call people on her cellphone while at the hostess stand while people are waiting, she asked some people to wait for her to finish her call, and to take the people to their table when they come in instead of just standing there smiling at them. I can't remember anything else but it was a pretty big list.
I know people who are dumb, like this girl who whenever we bring treats for class she says 'I don't like cake/cookies/muffins/whatever' but then eats it anyways and eats a lot of them.

Oh! I have the best dumb co-worker story!

I work at a high school with kids who have emotional and behavioral problems, so a lot of my job involves helping with junior high level homework. This woman regularly defines a word by using the word ("thifty? You know, like ... thifty.") teaches them to do things wrong (had them turning the fraction 3/4 into 133%) and regularly calls things "retarded" and calls another woman a "lezbo."

Buuuuttt, all this came to a poetically justified head when she started to tell me a story about something her husband had done. This long, involved story prominently featured a word I had never heard before. I actually thought "Hmmm, she must be smarter than I give her credit for, her vocabulary is bigger than mine." Finally, I asked her for clarification on this word that I didn't know.


The word? "ingorant"

And she said "You know, ingorant ... like stupid."